On a deserted bit of path an old man was riding a bicycle, slowly, when out popped the plain-clothes park policeman.

He produced a badge form his pocket, in a folding leather wallet, type used by Dirty Harry or Starsky and Hutch.

The undercover park cop then proceeded to demand details from the old man, name, address  etc.

Against the rules or not, I was just astonished at the idea of this undercover, deep-throat outfit busting old folk for getting some exercise. (The one thing I heard the old chap say with any clarity was, ‘there’s nowhere safe to take a leisurely ride,’ – to which the tree cop had not answer but, ‘It’s against the rules’.)

We may live in austere times, when proper cops, the ones fighting drug crime and terrorism, are facing the chop. But thank God we can still keep the plain-clothes wood detectives to smash those elderly two-wheeled n’ere-do-wells that blight our dells!

Gosling trio

Three goslings seen roaming, feeding and sleeping in Royal Crescent park.

The night the snow fell, I was walking home from somewhere; it was quite late, perhaps the early hours of morning. Passing the Royal Crescent park, I noticed there was a couple in there. It was dark, but the impression I got was that they were grown ups, middle-aged perhaps; certainly not teenagers.

I assumed they’d been overcome with snow-joy, albeit in the middle of the night, and were out making footprints, a snowman and throwing snowballs before anyone else got the chance.

Great, I thought, that there at least two adults in this rather stuffy neigbourhood so uninhibited.

The next morning, however, as a pale, watery light fell on the park, the true nature of their midnight recreation was revealed… 

snow art in w11

Ghost bike, Notting Hill Gate. A permanent memorial.

 Sunday 5th September a ghost-bike was fixed to a railing in Notting Hill Gate.

It’s there for many reasons, the main one being to mark the death of yet another London cyclist, Eilidh Jake Cairns.

Eilidh was killed by a tipper lorry near this spot. The lack of any witnesses meant the driver has not been prosecuted. 

The ghost-bike will also serve as street art and, one hopes, as an unsettling warning to all road users.

Ghost-bikes have become an increasingly common sight around London and the world, marking the spot of a fallen cyclist.

This particular ghost-bike is unusual in that London Mayor Boris Johnson gave his permission for it to remain  a permanent fixture.

Local authorities would normally remove them after a time. This one, however, will stay.

Ghost bike, Notting Hill Gate. A permanent memorial.

Men unload mountains of Estate Agent's glossy mags to pump through your letterbox.

 One of the joys of W11 life is taking the mountain of free, glossy mags that get pushed through your door to the recycling bin.

Captured here is the moment when the van turns up and the magazines, full of overpriced properties for sale, get divided up by the team.

That’s a lot of carefully prepared print material that no one wants. But every day, more turns up.

Estate agents - pure evil.

The ice-cream was so good and there were so many flavours, the little HP Tarquins and Jocastas practically exploded with impatience as their mums queued up.

(Though it is hard to queue there, have you noticed?)

But those of us with less liquidity are this week appalled to see the price of a single scoop go up from £2 to £2.50.

And this in the middle of a recession. Clearly they think we’re hooked.

Well, for me this price change has crossed a threshold of what I’m willing to pay. So, sadly, no more stracciatella for me.

caught on a mobile phone: moody skies over royal crescent

London does next to nothing for cyclists. It does so little it might as well be nothing. Other cities in Europe put London to shame.

Two cyclists were killed recently on High Street Kensington, one crushed by a lorry. Another was crushed by a lorry at Holborn. The Driver in the Holborn incident didn’t even know what he’d done until he was waved down by pedestrians.

London continues to mix bikes and Lorries and dense traffic.

This lovely young woman killed at Notting Hill Gate is just the latest pointless death. She was commuting to work in a green and healthy way.

In this case, the lorry driver can’t be prosecuted as no witnesses have so far come forward.

More…

Central London the Cycle crash capital of England

Cyclist killed in lorry collision is the second victim in a week…

This stumpy iron thing used to be twenty feet tall and was a vent for methane from the sewers. There used to be many of them around London, apparently.

(Taken on a mobile phone.)

Major Martian disruption on Addison Ave

The metal tube, believed to contain a giant three-legged robot with a heat-ray weapon ‘eye’, was found last week as someone tried to extent their basement to include a subterranean swimming pool and sauna.

Residents have been very put out by the alien object.

‘It has meant the Ocado van has had to park quite a bit further away,’ said one local.

Mums bringing their children to Norland Place School have had to park their SUVs up to fifty yards further away.

Six Tarquins,  two Jocastas and one Sherston reportedly needed emergency oxygen after the unforeseen requirement to walk.

Local councillor, Mr Bribes, assured residents the matter was being dealt with. “The chances of anything coming from Mars are a million to one,” he said.

But they still came.